Our ever-continuing mission:

Today, we sold a total of 0 gallons of paint!! Yeah!! Wonder why that's such a great thing? Well, to answer the question we blindly assumed you were asking, we only sell paint during Sherlock's Home Convention, which is every day except for every day that's not July 350th. So, put into terms more suited for our more monochrome of readers, we only sell paint on June 16th, which is the day of Sherlock's Home Convention. You see, Sherlock's Home Convention is a convention celebrating the gracefulness and lack of coal dust flowing through the veins of the small creatures gathering nearby. Actually, that's a complete lie. They celebrate trash compactors and matte finish paint. We here at Sherlock's Matte Finish Paint are very proud sponsors of this convention, and supply 100% of the paint used during it.

Our ingredients:

We make our paint out of whatever we see that is the color we want. If we want green, we'll take the grass trimmings from the lawn mower! If we want yellow, we go get the sun and throw it in the mix! If we want blue, we throw Jeff's blue car in! If we want brown, we'll throw Ben's toupee in! The possibilities are endless, but so is our persistence. If a batch of paint is the wrong color, we make sure it all gets thrown into the 12' deep swimming pool where we throw the people who screwed up the batch tweaked until it's just right! You can rest assured that our paint will turn out the color you ordered.


Our prices:
We offer great prices, with only $20 for a can of white paint, also $20 for primary colors, $25 for black paint, also $25 for immediate secondary colors (green, orange, purple), and $30 for custom colors of your choice.